Over the years, when you grow older and hopefully turn into a quite wiser person, you probably want to make some things different and want to try something new. By that I do not mean, that you have to invent something that will solve all of mankind’s problems, I mean these little big things that make the difference.
A lot of friends of mine and apprentices too made this by simply procreating. Sadly, a lot of these guys turned into a bunch of boring stereotype parents. But luckily, exceptions prove the rule and some of them remained the same or developed in a way I would totally approve.
This whole procreation thing never appeared intriguing to me and to be honest I’ll always find better things to do than founding a family and raise kids. But that’s not the total truth. I always say that I don’t like children and to be honest the children of other people always stress the shit out of me. But it’s mostly a thing that a lot of these parents mistake raising children for a trial by error experiment. These kids are best compared with a kamikaze pilot in World War II. They don’t know what they are actually doing but causing massive destruction.
Whatever the case, I always think about this family kids thing and I’ve found out that I don’t like children as a whole. It’s more the boys I do not like, because human boys, when they grow up are, in my opinion, the most primitive and boring species to raise that mother nature has to offer. I personally find a daughter way more interesting because girls tend to be more creative and enarmoured to art.
Boys play football, smash their toy cars, play violent video games and try to prove muscle power whenever possible. Even as a little boy, I couldn’t stand boys mainly because of the recently mentioned reasons. I never felt connected to my own gender as a matter of completely different interests. To a certain degree did I have the same interests, but at the end of the day I always had something different in mind. My best friend when I was a kid was a girl, till she moved with her parents to another country.
Another thing that I don’t really like, when I think about this whole father son relationship is the competition. I have this problem with my father as well, where we always end up in competing each other for no apparent reason. It might be some sort of funny when your boy is something between zero and ten, but when they get into this complicated age things will become even worse and they try to make territorial pissings whenever possible. I always hated this. Always.
I don’t know why, but my view about family founding has decently changed over the last couple of month. Even with this awkward depression period in late winter/early spring. It did not just change, I’ve also got an even more specific view on what I want and what I (maybe) do not want. It’s basically no longer this whole anti-family attitude that I was spreading before.
Well, we’ll see.